Thanks 2009 for bringing me such fun entertaining hourly and half hourly moments into my home. Now if 2010 can figure out how to get Comcast to actually let me watch things ON Demand, we'd be all set.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Thanks 2009 for bringing me such fun entertaining hourly and half hourly moments into my home. Now if 2010 can figure out how to get Comcast to actually let me watch things ON Demand, we'd be all set.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
How do you jumpstart a franchise that not only keeps old fans happy but can bring on new ones? The simple answer to that is to hire JJ Abrams. Now and forever I am a Trekkie, not to the extent of being able to tell you character birthdays, but I've been into all incarnations with the exception of Enterprise which not even Scott Bakula was into. With that said, this movie kept all the great parts of the Trek mythos and then decided to set out on its own path. Can't wait to see where this cast boldly goes from here.
Just looking at the above movie poster is making my eyes water all over again as if I was watching the movie in the theatre. I'm not easily frightened but to say this movie scared the crap out of me is like saying the sun is probably a little warm. It's been about 3-4 months since I saw it and I still can't think about it too much or I won't be able to get to sleep. The entire movie creeped me out, but the last 3 minutes are the things of my personal nightmares. Let's just say that with the imminent release of this movie on DVD I've made it clear this thing is to come nowhere near my home. Stupid scrapbooking demon....
My all time favorite movie of the year has to be (500) Days of Summer. Consisting of essentially 2 people falling in love, this movie has it all. A musical number, great dialogue, fantastic acting from Zooey Deschanel and Joseph Gordon Levitt (both under appreciated), and throw away reference to the 80's sitcom Small Wonder. I have recommended this movie to just about everyone I know and I will continue to do so until everyone I know watches it. Be warned, it's not for everyone but if you don't like it analyze why you don't and you'll see that the movie just makes all the more sense for it.
There you have it, not quite a Top 5 and nowhere near a Top 10. Still, these are the movies that stick out in my head as having a staying power with me from 2009. Not to say that I'll remember I saw them in 2009 (without the help of my blog that is), but these are movies I'll appreciate for quite some time. Wonder if 2010 will bring us anything near as varied and fun.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
And what a year it was! In the coming days I'll be blogging about all that best, at least my version of it, that 2009 brought us. If nothing else I'd have to say 2009 was the new year of the supernatural. Vampires were everywhere, unfortunately that includes more of that emo-nnoying Twilight series, and spirits haunted us in theatres and TV.
Maybe that's why we said goodbye to what seemed like so many famous faces this year. Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson, Brittany Murphy, Roy Disney, Ted Kennedy and Bea Arthur made their final appearances, just to name a few. However, I'd also say that 2009 was also the year of the welcome comeback. Thanks for coming back to us in top form Britney & Robbie, you've no idea how happy I am to see you both back in top form.
Even with all the ups and downs of the year, I think in the end any year where we can look back and have memories is a good year. Here's hoping you come back to join me for the recall of it all.
Sunday, December 20, 2009
To say I'm saddened by this news is putting it mildly. Anyone who knows me knows that I really liked this perky little actress. From her adorable face to the way she could just throw herself into any comedic scene with the abandon remniscent of Lucille Ball, this was a girl who just always caught and kept my attention on screen. It's not every cute girl who can make you believe that she is just that big a clown.
Having enjoyed her from her days on "Almost Home" to "Sister, Sister" and even "Boy Meets World" I was really happy to see her gain wide-spread attention. Even if it did come in a rather lengthy spurt after her turn as the lovable Tai in "Clueless." Just watch her in things like "Little Black Book" and "Uptown Girls," not the greatest movies at all but she brought such an energy and warmth to the characters that you just kinda smiled and went along for the ride. Not an easy feat considering either one could very easily fall into unlikeable territory based on their actions.
Then there's her singing voice. One of my all-time favorite songs is Queen's "Somebody to Love" to the point that I have several versions of said song. Among them is Brittany's cover from "Happy Feet," and it still remains one of my Top 3 favorite versions of the song. And just try to put on "Faster Kill Faster Pussycat" without moving your body to some degree of rythym. It's damn near impossible.
Was Brittany Murphy ever going to win any awards? Most likely not, but she was definitely in my underappreciated actor list where I put actors who always make me smile because they always bring their A game even if they never reach mainstream uber-fame. Sadly, we'll never get to see if she would make it off that list. Rest in peace Brittany, to paraphrase Clueless, I hope you're rollin' with the homies in heaven.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Like many, we're about to enter my absolute favorite time of the year. Decorations, parties, family, friends...I can't even begin to express how much I look forward to this season all year long. Let's not forget the shopping, I'm also counting down the minutes to Black Friday, literally, 12am I'm going to be one of the masses storming into Toys R Us to fight over severely reduced prices that most recipients will proceed to play with for only a combined 10 minutes before the next Christmas. But it's all worth it for that look of happy when the paper is ripped off.
And with that I just want to give thanks for all the wonderful things in my life from my incredible other half to my increasingly adorable nephew to you, my readers, who take the time out to read my ramblings and make me feel that I'm not just typing into the ether.
However, after my attempt at the detox diet last week I'm mostly thankful for the feast that will be put before me tomorrow. Now bring on the grub cuz we all know Thanksgiving's also the start of the eating season and that's a time of year I can ALWAYS get behind.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Go ahead, call me a quitter and the like. I just can't take anymore of this cabbage only thing. I'm in the middle of a pitch at work, my cold is still lingering and quite frankly today I almost tore someone's head off and it wouldn't have mattered who because I was ready to place it on a stick and use it as a warning to others.
I can see how it would deliver results and the like but at the end of the day the only true way to lose weight of any kind is a balanced diet and excercise, not eating the same soup for 7 days to lose a few pounds and possibly find yourself on the receiving end of a restraining order.
The worst part is that tonight I worked at least 8 hours at the office and when they came around with pizza I turned it down despite my extreme hunger. I turned down pizza. Seeing as how I have about 4 days left of working like mad I can't continue depriving myself of what I want and what I want has cheese, meat, sauce, everything.
Now if you'll excuse me I have to go devour the first thing I find in my kitchen.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
But oh the potato.
See Day 2 allows me one baked potato with butter. And I have just eaten it and I must say I have never loved starch anywhere near as much as I did tonight. Unlike before I literally savored each and every bite as I chewed it enough times to actually feel full.
As day 3 rears its head I've had to make some more of the soup. Granted I'm cheating a bit by adding more of, oh, every vegetable but cabbage. Yet it now actually tastes good again as opposed to over processed dishwater.
Eh, at least day 3 lets me add fruit into the mix again. Will Friday and its beef allowance ever get here?
Monday, November 16, 2009
As day 1 of my cabbage diet winds down I am left with only one thought....OH MY WORD I AM ABSOLUTELY OVERWHELMINGLY HUNGRY!
See, there were meetings all day today which of course meant that there was breakfast provided. And by breakfast I mean delicious muffins, fluffy bagels and some of what appeared to be the best whipped cream cheese on earth. Now, that's not bad enough right? Oh no, let's follow it up with sandwiches that are at least 6 inches tall, potato salad that has the right ratio of shape to smush and cookies that I swear started off life as giant boulders to drop on the Coyote. I barely made it through the first day.
Although I have to say the hunger is almost preferable to the endless trips to the bathroom. I have never peed so much in my life. I swear that I have officially urinated more times than my grandmother on an average day and her visits to my parents' house alone sees her go at least 4 times per hour.
So I sit here chugging water in the hopes that it'll sate my hunger. I'm fairly certain it won't so maybe I'll just sit here on the couch and sniff the bowl of chocolates. Can't wait for day 2, soup and vegetables, yum. I've never yearned for a baked potato this much.
Sunday, November 15, 2009
I know, I know the only real solution to weight loss is physical activity and a good diet, I get it. With that said, I like to look at this diet as a clean start, detox sort of thing. I'll do this cabbage diet for a week and use it to jumpstart my better way of life. True, I'm a bit of a crazy person to even attempt this with Thanksgiving and Christmas around the corner and you'd be right. But I do like to challenge myself and the Monday of Thanksgiving week does see my schedule opening up a bit for a gym routine to start up again.
I'll try to blog about this throughout the week, not so much to be all inspirational, but rather because I think it'll be easier to blog than think about eating. Just keep that in mind if my update blogs resemble something along the lines of a Food Network version of "The Shining."
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Saying Germans are odd is like saying the peanut butter is sticky, it's just understood to be true. Even so, I couldn't be ready for what I saw on a comic website (comics101.com) yesterday. While in Germany, the writer visited a comic-con. Granted, dressing up to meet artists and scrounge for over-priced toys and yellowing back issues, is left of normal, but I think the Germans have yet again found a way to niche the hell out of even this.
Below are videos taken from something called a "Strawberry Heroes" show where women dress as super heroes & dance around while intermixing songs. For example, the following shows Booster Gold & Aquaman apparently being schooled by Supergirl on bettering themselves. So naturally, the German Girl of Steel busts out into "Popular" from Wicked. To review, superheroes, German, modern Broadway standard. Enjoy.
Now what hero show would be complete without Spider-Man? One that doesn't put him in a sparsely decorated Benny Hill sketch.
After all that fighting and dancing, of course the Justice League would be tired and just ready to beam back up to the satelite right? Wrong, that's the perfect time for a gospel moment. Testify Booster Gold!
Even still, they're not tired, I mean they're German and if Mike Myers taught us anything about Germans while on SNL is that after all is said and done, IT'S TIME TO DANCE!
My only regret is that there aren't more of these clips online or in a continuous narrative. Not that I speak German or anything, but who can resist the evolution of a dance evolution? Here's hoping Bono & The Edge saw this, after all who wouldn't want to see Spidey running around the theatre chasing Mary Jane in lingerie? Oh, a boy can dream can't he?
Saturday, November 7, 2009
To know me is to know of my love of Melrose Place. The sexy, the over-the-top, the explosions. Most of all however, whatI love is the Amanda. So you can imagine how excited I am with her return (Tuesday, November 17 check your local listings!) to the complex she oversaw with her mini-skirted iron fist.
Let me just make this clear, in some weird way the character of Amanda Woodward is the reason I now work in advertising. That alone should probably make me hunt down Heather Locklear & exec producer Darren Starr for revenge, but it's true. She made the industry seem really enticing & let's face it, my only other advertising role models were a man whose witch wife did everything for him & Angela Bower with her big hair and shoulder pads (love you Judith Light!). So of course Amanda had that right blend of humor & blood lust that I would gravitate towars. Although it wasn't easy, let's review shall we?
She bought a building out of love & spite. She clawed her way up the ranks of apparently the only agency in LA based on the amount of new pitches they'd handle on a weekly basis. Not only did she consistently berate (Allison totally deserved it for existing) & sleep with her colleagues without once incurring the wrath of HR, but when the company president died, she just moved one step to the left to assume her rightful place at the top. Oh yeah & did I mention surviving cancer, destruction of her investment (does All State cover homicidal redheads?), & more black mailing than practically anyone on an 80's prime time soap. All that & she always managed to look good with an active sex life. Who wouldn't idolize her?
As November 17 draws near I think I'll take a new approach in my career and ask myself "What Would Amanda Do?" Oh sure, it might mean running from the mob or being put on trial, but 20 years later everyone will still remember me right? Now if you'll excuse me I have to figure out which of my co-workers to insult into alcoholism.
In no way am I condoning domestic violence. I fully understand that it's not something of which to make light and that there are some cases where the victim doesn't get the opportunity to come back, get another horrific haircut and still be honored as a Cosmo woman of the year. However, for this pop star to say she realizes how she is an influence and can do good to bring attention to this while she has 2 new singles to promote and an album less than a month away, is insulting to anyone who's ever been in a similar situation.
Celebrities using their personal struggles as fodder for the front page is nothing new, but what makes me sick is how we all fall over backward trying to place her on a pedestal for doing this. She had almost a year to go out and do public service announcements, visit shelters, set up charitable events and yet what did she do? Record an album. I know that art can be healing, but if you think that Rhianna is actually an artist and not a Caribbean Barbie doll that everyone is obsessed with for whatever reason, you're clearly deluded.
Before my feelings toward this woman where that she had a few catchy songs that she couldn't really sing because she had no voice or apparent dance moves, but ok who am I to begrudge anyone success? But to use your own vicious experience as a press release in which to drop the name of your upcoming projects? Sorry, even a blank android being propped up for profit can recognize that's just plain wrong. Disturbia indeed.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Kitties were affected all around! Although they appeared to like it, which kinda fits in with their whole not needing people motif. That and they most likely were happy to bat around the soft material between their paws.
Not all was so benign though. Neither the gladiator nor the fairy took well to the hat, although one was having stomach problems and the other was hormonal. Up to you to guess which is which!
Saturday, October 31, 2009
This year Sony Entertainment decided that their presentation of the programming for next year would be done with a Halloween party. Granted, the actual presentations consisted of videos on a screen and nothing more. The best part of the whole thing however is that Sony was yet again having a party!! Now for those of you who haven't had the pleasure can I just say that most of the hands down best times I've had at events have been Sony ones.
These guys know how to put together a presentation. From the centerpieces with creepy apothecary bottles to the dancers that performed Thriller. And let me not forget that hired actors that portrayed the Universal Monsters, Wolfman was the creepiest, and he probably had nards (if you don't get that reference please go rent Monster Squad post haste!).Oh and the food...mini everything is just a good way to go, granted this is from a guy who has an odd appreciation for midgets, but I don't think that really matters in the big overall.
As I gear up for another party tonight (what can I say, we're a popular couple) I just want to give a huge shout out thanks to everyone who made the Sony party happen. Edith, Joe, Irving and the countless others at Sony who make sure that not only everything comes out just right but that we all enjoy ourselves. Here's to next year topping this one!
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Monday, October 19, 2009
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Back to my once in a lifetime (at this point anyway) experience. Truly the concert gods smiled upon me & my friends on Sunday as we got there about 15 minutes before the doors opened, were at basically the back of the line that wrapped around the block & STILL managed to get in before a majority of people who got there earlier and were essentially in front of us. Look, I'm not saying I'm proud of it or that I don't feel bad for people who got there at like 10am & then had to stand at the back. With that said I'm just chalking it all up to the karma of being a nice guy who helped a woman pick up her avocados at Bryant Park on Saturday while others gawked. See, fruit can bring good things other than digestion.
Hmmm, maybe that's why she tends to favor the theme of Showgirl. Although unlike Liz Berkely's Nomi, this is one showgirl who I can guarantee doesn't paint her nipples, especially not 2 different colors.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Some of you know that I'm currently in NYC for the Kylie Minogue concert on Sunday. But what you don't know is that I'm also here because choosing a winner was so hard that I needed to enlist the help of some special judges who just so happen to be in NY for the concert as well. Without further ado I present the judges for our first ever TheIsh79 blog contest.
You know him from Project Runway, top American designer Michael Kors.
MK: Hi guys.
Currently unemployed former American Idol judge, Paula Abdul.
PA: Hi, I just want to say that all your captions have beautiful souls that could light up a room and generate the power for terminally ill wings at hospitals.
And extra special judge, leader of that evil organization bent on world domination, Cobra Commander.
CC: Helloooooo guyssssssssssssss.......
Thank you 3 for joining me on my blog to get this contest judged. So let's begin. Now there were several of your entries that just made me laugh out loud and some of you even appealed to my ego, which totally works. But in the end we had to whittle it down to 3 finalists. Based on the level of creativity and random pop culture type references, they are Julisa, Omar & Yvette and Inneabelle. So judges, let's start in the order they posted, first with Julisa.
MK: Her comment was just so trashy. I mean the costumes she referenced were cheap, the material non-existent. It's like a drag queen or something.
Umm, Michael, there are drag queens in the video and you haven't even mentioned the quote. Paula?
PA: Videos on youtube are great for comments, because they have a section for comments so we should leave comments because they let people know how we feel.
CC: Where issssssss the blue in the comment? It's just not evil enough. Perhaps that's because Julisa is plotting against me! RETREAT!!!!!
Well, in my opinion she totally gets points for referencing an obscure movie down to the exact minute where the similarity shows. Frankly, for that alone she has more than earned her place in the Top 3. Now on to Omar & Yvette's comment.
MK: Was this a team challenge? It's almost like they can't work without each other. Dependency on pre-made things is never going to get you far in this industry.
You are aware they're not being judged on designs right?
MK: Huh, what?
PA: The power of a team is better than that of being alone. Nobody should ever be alone. It's like Ricky Martin sang with Christina Aguilera. And now, she knows how to work with people with all her duos and co-writing with Linda Perry. I mean, really what is going on?
Clearly, nothing in your head. Although every fiber in my being says I'll regret it, Cobra Commander your take?
CC: It'sssssss that blassssssted GI Joe, alwaysssssss ruining my plansssss. Baronessssssss! Desssssstro!!!!
I'm beginning to think I could have saved on some airfare. Regarding the entry, you need to go see the pic she posted. Aside from finding the Pair of Nuts comedy duo to be hilarious the pic is just dead-on. Unfortunately, as my sister and brother-in-law, they're ineligible for the prize. That leaves me with only one entry left and God help me I'm going to ask for more insight from the judges.
MK: Would an alien really mate with Gollum? I mean it's always the same thing, creatures with creatures, mix it up honey. Take us somewhere else than Middle Earth or St. Tropez for a change.
PA: The absolute best thing to put on bread is jam but only straberry jam. It's like if Michael Jackson's song JAM was a jam, I don't think it'd be strawberry. It seems more like a spring blend of honey and mint. Delicious, just delicious.
Just, just go for it.
CC: Perhapssssss I'll recruit thissssss Gollum for our evil forcesssss....yesss, yessss...COBRAAAAA!!!!!
For the love of...ok, the hell with you crazies. Seriously, 2 of you are like walking catch phrases and I'm not entirely sure the other one isn't a cardboard cut-out with a voicebox. By sheer length and managing to mix Alf, Lord of the Rings and the Estefans I just have to award the prize of my first ever blog contest to Inneabelle. The creativity and out of left field story that she submitted is just the pinnacle of the bizarre ass-ness of the minds of those reading my blogs. As out there as I may post things, I can always count on you guys to provide commentary that matches it word for word.
Thank you for all your comments, views, and signing up as followers. I write because I feel the need but to know it's being read just makes it all better. Now, if you'll excuse me I have to make sure 3 judges accidentally fall on the 3rd rail.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Ok so no secret that most people who blog are pretty much just looking for attention. It's a creative outlet and what not but it's also a way for people to talk about me in a way that doesn't seem too forced and that they can attribute to just being observations on my wit.
To that end I've decided to hold a contest to see if I can get more people to actually sign up and list themselves as blog followers as well as encourage the leaving of comments. The contest is very simple and while I don't have the prize determined YET, I'll try to make it something fun and well, Ish-like. :-)
To enter you need to leave a comment in my comments section that tells me what you think is happening in the picture below. It can be an explanation, a caption, just make it funny! Most likely I'll just keep this going for about a week or 2 before deciding on the winner, depending of course on the results of how many people even bother to "enter."
So without further ado, I want you to tell me and my readers exactly what is going on in this photo:
Monday, September 14, 2009
And then I played the VMA's that I DVR-ed in favor of watching True Blood.
Let's just get this out of the way, Kanye's a douche. It's nothing new people, at this point he should just change his middle name to Masengil. What he did do, however, was actually get me to like Taylor Swift! Seriously, whenever I'd see her jr-Renee Zelweiger lemon face I just got the urge to throw hamsters at her or something. And that "Belong To Me" song? Please, it might as well be called "Anthem For The Ugly, Un-popular Girl At Home Singing Into Her Brush While She Cries Looking At The Mirror." Watching her up there so lost and shocked at the commandeering of the stage by Mr. Summer's Eve though, made me really like her more. And then she proceeded to give one of the best performance of the night. I can even tolerate that song now! Fine, it may have something to do with the fact that I secretly always wanted to do a music video taking place solely on a moving subway car, but still.
It's not to say the rest of the night didn't have its moments. Isn't it funny that Madonna and Pink both provided the most sedate appearances of the night? Although shout out to Pink for her trapeze bit with the Duela Dent inspired outfit (http://temple.fpsbanana.com/ico/sprays/duela_dent.png, http://www.popcrunch.com/pink-mtv-vmas-2009-performance-video-sober-live-on-a-trapeze/music-mtv-8/), but why did I think her boobs were bigger than they appeared? Also, the pairing of Shakira and Taylor Lautner from Twilight as presenters was inspired, even though I didn't get the connection until they were almost done. Think about it....it's actually quite clever for MTv. And who knew that Beyonce would treat us all to an urban version of a Busby Berkley musical? Probably one of the few times her stalker-ish obsession with sequins didn't make me want to go to her house and take away her Bedazzler.
But of course, what would a VMA be without my take on the things I quite frankly could do without. Russel Brand, I'm sure you're a nice enough guy but you're not funny. No really, see I like all things British and get the dry wit thing, but your schtick is just not funny...kinda like Andy Samberg and Jimmy Fallon. Guys, the average MTv viewer barely remembers Lil' Bow Wow and you're referencing MotownPhilly? Way to be on the cusp of the humor, boys.
Then there's Lady Gaga. I get it, you have a great voice but let's be realistic so do many other aspiring singers. So you figured you'd be a little, let's call it avant garde, and guess what? It worked, you got signed. Now can you please stop? Seriously, enough already, everytime I see you I feel like I'm watching the mutated love child of Christina Aguilera and Beaker from the Muppets. We get it, you're out there. However, with each passing day you get closer to being left out there because frankly at this point the only thing left to do is light yourself on fire. And should it come to that, not that I wish you harm but I would watch, could you also do the world a favor and take your ardent fan-bitch Perez Hilton with you? I couldn't think of a single other person more deserving of being lit ablaze than that flamer.
On the subject of queens, I have to say that one of my favorite bands of all time is Queen. One of the my least favorite things of all time is Katy Perry covering Queen and covering Queen as if she was bored out of her mind instead of singing a song that'll be around longer than her career. And she was singing with Joe Perry from Aerosmith! At least she didn't win anything, although did anyone else notice during Beyonce's performance that she was apparently accompanied by a reincarnated Liberace? Who knew that aside from Kissing a Girl she could also raise the dead?
Which reminds me, where was Kurt Loder last night? Has he finally reached the point where his reanimated corpse doesn't photograph? It's just not a VMA without him interviewing Madonna as she tries to get him to show the human emotion he gave up so long ago in exchange for immortality. Ahh the good old days.
Every year I find myself saying "who is that?" more and more as I watch this awards show. I also say each year that I really don't care to watch the VMAs before plopping myself down to inhale the trashiness of it all. Truthfully I'll probably watch them well into senility and by then I'm sure the only face I'll still recognize will be Kurt Loder. Or whatever part of his original face is actually left by that point.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Now usually my tales of bloggy goodness consist of me weaving a tale of the events in a way that would make Aesop stand up and say "dude, seriously are you even trying for a moral with this?" This time, due to a combination of lacking desire to think and being tired of following up my activities with a leisurley jaunt to the gym, I've decided to just bullet-point things. Don't worry, the wit is still there...can't change the formula too much now can I?
- Bartenders: Everyone knows that bartender make their money on tips and that's usually why they're so pleasant and flirtatious and look like they never leave the gym. Why then was I met with such horrendous service at Buck 15 regarding my tab and then desire to close it? What pains me is that I really do love this place but the 5 year old who couldn't find my card and then proceeded to tell me I must have set up my tab with the other guy who looked nothing like him, yeah he either needs to go or needs to be taught a lesson in how to treat people if he wants to make money. On the polar opposite of this was the bartender at VooDoo Lounge last night who now only offered me a sympathetic look upon advising me that water was $7, but did so with a smile on his face that said "sorry about that, but I'm still cute, right?" He was the eptiome of what a bartender should be, someone ready to take your money but in a way that makes you feel ok with doing so. Hooker would probably have less stigma if they followed this buisness plan...and if they started accepting tabs I guess.
- Daisy Deadpetals: If you haven't had the opportunity to see this performer do her/his thing you should check out youtube, go on I'll wait....man, they're taking forever, must be watching the Whitney one, that one's funny....back? Great, so as I was saying, not only hilarious but able to spin some great music too. The more I listen to what she/he says the more I realize there's a brain under all that synthetic hair. It's been said that comedy isn't easy and that to do it well you have to be smart. I agree, plus how much harder is it when you have to do all that and tuck?
- Drag Look Alike: On the subject of drag queens I HAVE to mention this one I saw not only on Thursday but Sunday night. Ok, could one of you who follows me here that knows Veronica Ortega please tell her there's a man out there running around looking EXACTLY like her. The lips, the nose, the eyes, the hair, everything. And for the record, this Vero look-alike smacked me across the face not once but twice with her weave. Having never been hit with fake hair before I have to say it hurt. I dunno, maybe the real Vero can lend the drag Vero some of her hair to make a wig? Future victims of hair whippings will be grateful.
- Celebrity Sightings: Thursday night saw me peeking at an actual NKOTB member as Jonathan Knight hung out in the corner of the club, apparently with one of Britney's tour dancers. Then Sunday gave me a double whammy of a celebrity sighting, first of local news reader Craig Stevens and then Grammy winner Deborah Cox. At the risk of sounding catty or trite, can I just say that in the future when introducing a singer perhaps Mr. Stevens should stay away from saying how "it always seems like her lyrics are written about my latest break-up with a boyfriend?" Gosh Craig and then did you write about it in your journal before heading down to the mall and hanging with your BFFs? As for Ms. Cox she was in fine form, belting out all her hits, extending notes, pretty much working the stage for all it's worth. But I will say this, her performance last night kind of proved to me that Whitney Houston isn't the only black diva to sweat a small puddle under her when performing. Same script, different cast indeed.
So there you have it, the highlights of my weekend. Sure there were plenty of other odd little characters bouncing about (I'm talking about you adrogyny crew at Buck, as well as you old man with no shirt whose nipples looked more like knee guards they were so low), but why focus on them? After all, this is supposed to be my day off.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Now as far as 80's cartoons go no question He-Man's the undisputed king of the nostalgia kingdom. The transformation chant, the playsets, the end of episode morals, it had it all. However, if He-Man was the gold then Thundercats were the silver. Based around a band of humanoid cats who crashlanded on a planet as their race's last survivors they battled the evil Mum-Ra for possesion of the mystical Sword of Omens. And if you think my plot summation is too simplistic, clearly you never saw an episode.
Sitting here watching I marvel at so much of it. While the character designs were simplistic, there was a richness to detail in other areas. True, it was animated in Asia allowing the backgrounds an attention to detail that your average Saturday morning fare today is sorely missing, even amongst those with an Anime feel. You watch Thundercats and almost can't help but wait for some overly exageratted transformation sequence.
Then there are overall story elements they'd never get away with today. In the first episode alone their home planet blows up, ships in their armada get destroyed with presumably casualties and their mentor dies of old age. Oh and did I mention that the protagonists spend a good 1/3 of the episode naked? But it's weird cuz some of them have belts and there are lines seperating their legs from their torsos like they're wearing costumes but they're not. I guess they had to draw the line somewhere and that line apparently gets drawn at the depiction of animated feline genitals. Who knew?
Character wise the heroes were pretty simplistic, although watching it now I have to say Lion-O was a total dick for the first few episodes. Crash landing on Third Earth (some sort of descended version of our earth, but this was back before Al Gore so we don't know what happened to the first 2 although I'm sure it had more to with weird ass civilaztions constantly crashing here than global warming) in suspended animation Lion-O was a child before landing, but woke up an adult. From the second he wakes up, he starts barking orders at everyone like he hasn't just been asleep for 10 galacti-years (their term not mine, I swear). Not only that but he then proceeds to use the Sword of Omens which 3 seconds before he didn't even recognize and declares himself Lord Lion-O. The guy just realized he has pubes, granted no small feat considering they're presumably covered in fur, and now he's anointed himself king? The hell?! And the less said about him waking up fully muscular after doing nothing more strenuous than breathe for umpteen years the better.
Yet, here I sit typing while watching Mum-Ra turn to locusts to invade the village of the Berbils and all I can do is smile. In just 3 episodes the heroes have alternately threatened the villains with rattling their bones and breaking their necks. They even used the word reconnosaince in verb tense! I didn't even know that word HAD a verb tense!
I could go on and on as I just keep finding more and more to love again about this show. All I hope though is that this isn't some type of weird vision of the future cartoon because somehow I just know that if it is that means I probably wind up being Mum-Ra. Hmmm....although he was pretty ripped for a mummy.
Monday, August 31, 2009
I think it's absolutely fantastic.
Trolling the message boards after the announcement today I was reminded there's a reason most comic book geeks are considered basement-dwelling virgins. It's because they resist change in a way that makes them seem as if though they have no true grasp on reality. The truth is if you think Disney's acquisition is going to result in the Avengers lining up for a first name roll call, you're quite frankly a moron.
Maybe it's a result of my marketing background but what I see is quite honestly one of the best opportunities for Marvel in a long time. The sad truth is with each passing year comic book readership dwindles as the average readership age continues skewing older and older with kids turning more and more to electronic devices. The average comic's price point doesn't help either with $3.99 being the norm and not the special edition exception. Close inspection suggests this is no longer a hobby aimed at bringing in new younger readers. And I'm one of those who argues comics can be made for all ages, but the truth is that to survive a business needs constant new consumers. Disney can help make that happen.
This is a company that has managed to infiltrate the farthest regions opening up countless distribution opportunities. There now exist possibilites for Marvel's characters to be available in areas where money just didn't allow before and I'm not just talking about countries. Let's face it Disney is more often accepted in places than the X-Men are, talk about being feared and hated, right? Oh yeah and a few years from now when other studios are no longer interested in licensing super-heroes, Disney will be able to keep our favorite heroes on the screen, whether silver or small. Creatively Marvel's also in a better position to foster it's lower selling titles that are more creative experiment than blockbuster seller.
Don't think I've forgotten about the House of Mouse. They stand to gain as much as the House of Ideas if not more in this venture. Thanks to smart mareketing on Marvel's end B.M. (Before Mickey), the share holders now collect the profit off the ventures and expenses of others. Fox and Sony push the movies, Disney gets a cut. Mattel stocks the shelves, Disney stocks their coffers. Not to mention the sheer beauty of making money off souveniers selling at their theme park competition.
All in all I see both companies reaping benefits of this union. Lest people forget that DC Comics is part of Warner Bros. and from cartoons to toys to movies it's a 30+ year strong marriage that's given both parties much to love in their joint account.
So I say welcome to the Marvel Universe Mickey, Donald, Minnie and the rest. Just one piece of advise, watch out for Norman Osborne ok? I'm pretty sure not even Disney magic could make that man pleasant.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
With that said, I'd been itching to go dancing more than a tap dancer with restless leg syndrome (seriously, when did this even become such a big deal that to garner a name and a pill to boot!). So after getting gussied up, yes gussied, sometimes Wild West slang just works, we ventured to the land Bravo made me want to set ablaze, South Beach. Once there we made our way to quite possibly the coolest bar/lounge not only on Lincold Rd but all of South Beach. Buck 15.
Describing Buck 15 is to know it. Nestled atop Miss Yip's chinese restaurant this place can possibly accommodate 12 people comfortably. This of course translates into finding upwards of 300 people crammed together on an average night. Then there's the fact they've either no real discernible air conditioning or just can't be bothered to pay the electric bills because it is HOT in there. And not "oh it's a little warm in here sir I may just get the vapors" kind of hot. No, no, I'm talking "Holy Hell by way of a lava pit I think my blood may just be congealing as we speak where it not for the fact that our words turn to vapor as they hit the air."
And yet I completely love this place.
Aside from being a cardio class with liquor, which I understand is the actual description of most Bally's aerobics classes, the music in this place is phenomenal! Last night alone the mix ran the gamut from Blur, James Brown, Michael Jackson, Gwen Stefani and The Cure. A truly ecclectic blend that brought out just as ecclectic a clientele.
South Beach isn't exactly known for complacency or uniformity, but when I find myself literally laughing myself into a fit, it's definitely the result of seeing a man just clearing 3'3" staring up a man easily 3 feet taller. And please note this was a shockingly short man, none of that weirdly proportioned midget stuff here, no sir. Then there was the Eastern European sounding woman who bumped into me for what I still think was the sole purpose of advising me that the next song was by Lisa Stansfield. Now I enjoy the spit-curled singer as much as the next guy but well, no it wasn't the next song was Kelis' "Milkshake." Damn her and her iron curtain tongue setting my expectations up only to be dashed!
While the night ended prematurely at about 3-ish, maybe it was the right time. After all there's such a thing as too much of a good thing. Well, at least until the next time I get the hankering to sweat while dancing, which is always welcome...unless Richard Simmons is there.
That'd be weirder than an Eastern block, Lisa Stansfield loving non-midget.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Which brings us to the here and now of it all. Much like, well at this point, everyone in the universe I've decided to cop a squat on my own lil' blog area. It's not going to change any minds, start any trends or create any degree of an uproar, but it just felt like time for me to put my unique perspective down on digi-paper. Particularly since Facebook is just all kinds of user un-friendly when it comes to things like posting blogs. Seriously, I'm still not 100% sure why we all decided to jump the MySpace ship so quickly in favor of the Facebook rocket. It's just too uniform really, I mean blue and white are nice colors and all but what if I wanna put a background of Sandy Duncan dressed as a milkmaid skiing down the Alps with Gorbachev? Depriving anyone's followers of that is just plain wrong bordering on sadistic if you think about it.
And as if some bizarre self-propelled carousel, that brings us back to this blog. No promises as to this being an actually entertaining blog, not that I'm un-entertaining there's pretty much a small island of people who'd attest to the opposite. Sometimes I'll be entertaining, other times funny, hell I may even be insightful, but I don't recommend holding your breath on that one since aside from having a cool name that could easily stand shoulder to shoulder with the likes of Confucious and Plato, I'm way more apt to just make an observation about how all the female leads in Jesscia Simpson's "Private Affair" video end in the letter 'A' than I am to make some sort of world shattering pronouncement. Unless...that whole 'A' thing is part of a larger plan....hmmm
Basically, I'm saying thanks for reading this and I promise to make this cyber verbal road trip as fun as possible.
But I totally control the music selection, ok?