Sunday, April 3, 2011


So I'm most likely behind in posting this since it's not really revolutionary or anything, but here goes. There are just some people whose statuses on Facebook make me feel like severing their arm and beating them with it.

To me a facebook status or post should be either what you're doing or some sort of witty observation. Now perhaps I'm asking for too much, but there are just some people whose facebook statuses make me want to throttle them:

People Who Need Spell/Grammar Check To Survive: I get that we all make spelling mistakes, especially with the onset of smartphones with their tiny keyboards. However, for the love of all that's holy there are some people who just can't be bothered to spell or write a coherent sentence. If you haven't mastered the art of knowing when to make a word plural you shouldn't be allowed to write to the world.

The Uber Blessed: I'm all for wishing blessings on others, but everyday for everything? I knew I had reached my breaking point when I read somebody say they were feeling blessed because their washing machine was being delivered. Unless you're beating your clothes on a rock there's no reason to feel blessed for an appliance.

The Constant Lovebirds: Love is a many splendored thing, but if all you do is post love notes to your other half using cutesy language, you must be publicly flogged until you can't remember their name much less the pet name. If you feel the need to constantly affirm your love in a public forum maybe you need a little too much affirmation in your life.

I'm Reposting Cuz It's True: I'm glad to finally be getting less chain/junk emails, until I realized it's only because they've taken on another form in the "Please Post This If You...." I support various charities, causes and actions. Unfortunately most of the re-post status requests are so full of false and fictional claims that it'd be like re-posting headlines about Batboy.

There you have it, my list of people who annoy me on Facebook. I'm sure there are more of them out there and please do feel free to share them with me and each other. After all until we recognize the problem, we can't beat the cause into submission and eventual extinction.

1 comment:

  1. you forgot to mention that ones which a) post an update even when they poop! and b) the my kids are the Best in the whole wide world kind of person... ugh. i love my kids more than anyone, but seriously---